COM Newsletter - April 2023
Cult of PRIDE or
a Banner of HUMILITY?
“Except the Lord of hosts had left us a very small remnant, we should have been as Sodom, and we should have been like unto Gomorrah.” Isaiah 1:9 KJV
Recently while doing research for an unrelated study, I was reminded of some basic elements typical of cults with properties they often display. Some condensed markers defining a cult are as follows:
A movement held together by an ideology that purportedly has all the answers/solutions provided by a belief system that can only be accessed by a certain group.
A transcendent uniqueness touting as transformational and believed to bring each member to a better place, experiencing liberation from negative history.
An educational indoctrination readily provided, to achieve this coveted position.
A control system which may include adherence to a new world view, new language, redefined morals and behaviors that severs past associations (friends/family with different views) through various rules and regulations. Often this results in a sense of purpose and loyalty and a duty to recruit others.
A system of influence, more subtly interlaced with peer pressure and group acceptance, which ultimately becomes a new identity. At this point, individual thought diminishes, critical thinking is thwarted, and the former self ceases to exist.
As I looked at this phenomenon, I began to reminisce over the hundreds of prayer requests that have poured into Coming Out Ministries over the years. Young people being bullied to become gay because of mannerisms, without having experienced any same-sex attraction. Dozens of families torn apart because they would not affirm gender confusion or surgical mutilation of reproductive organs. Children demanding parents accept their bisexual or homosexual behaviors, polyamorous partnerships, immoral entertainment with many completely walking away from their faith in God. Responses seem scripted and ’victimization’ grows to the point where many believe only those ‘like them’ could understand them. Pride cult(ure) can be very cruel to those choosing to walk away; often these individuals are belittled, ostracized and in the case of those de-transitioning, some have even been threatened.
The Bible likens open rebellion to the ‘sin of witchcraft’. It shuts down our moral center and leaves us vulnerable to the lies of a godless culture. We have been duly warned of the enemy’s repetitious plots; how sexual sin is always the last card Satan plays before complete annihilation of any civilization. In our current society, lust is celebrated, recognition of biological gender banned, language altered (i.e., pronoun war), rampant pedophilia among those in highest positions of authority, polyamorous relationships applauded and most devastatingly; the grooming and mutilation/sterilization of minors. All this immoral chaos has flown under a flag called PRIDE. Pride, an operating premise fully acknowledged by the God of Heaven as an abomination. He tells us plainly in His word that He opposes the proud. Satan was cast out of heaven because the corruption of pride had penetrated his heart. Pride will always alienate us from God, and we have been assured it will precede our destruction. And yet, as a church (corporately) we offer little help to members in this time of unprecedented self-indulgence. At best, we share similarities with the dance band aboard the Titanic, playing “Nearer my God to Thee” while thousands are drowning in a sea of sexual confusion. At worst, we are throwing them anchors of misinformation (Guiding Families), instead of life-preservers of truth (Revelation 14).
Oswald Chambers has given us a definitive response to the ‘Love is Love’ mantra we hear so frequently. “God and love are synonymous. Love is not an attribute of God, it is God; whatever God is, love is. If your conception of love does not agree with justice, judgment, purity, and holiness, then your idea of love is wrong. In that case, it is not love you conceive in your mind but some vague infinite foolishness, all tears and softness and utter weakness.” (The Love of God p.12) Yes, God’s perfect love requires all the boundaries of love to finally eradicate the sin that is killing us. His children will praise Him throughout eternity for these guardian truths of His character, justice, judgment, purity, and holiness.
So, what can WE do? In just a few weeks, the world will embrace PRIDE month once again. I would like to challenge each of us to take some time to study true HUMILITY and all that God’s word has to say about it. Let us kneel before Jesus and seek to learn from Him how it was, that He was able to ‘humble Himself and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross’ (Philippians 2:8). Let us intercede for this banner of HUMILITY to wave over us individually as well as a corporate church body - ‘for we shall be like Him’. (1 John 3:2) As our Father gives us a deeper insight of our humble King Jesus, let us begin to pray for this same spirit to fall upon the church mightily.
“I saw that the strength of the children of God is in their humility. When they are little in their own eyes, Jesus will be to them their strength and their righteousness and God will prosper their labors.” (Gospel Workers (1892) p.365)
May God bless us as we help each other ‘do justly, love mercy and to walk humbly with our God.’ (Micah 6:8) Let’s raise a flag of HUMILITY in honor of the Savior Who gave His all for us!
Scripture References with suggestions to begin a study on humility: James 4:6-7, Isaiah 14:12-15, Proverbs 16:18, Proverbs 6:16-17, Psalms 10:1, Proverbs 8:13, 1 Corinthians 1:27-29, Micah 6:8, Philippians 2:5,6, 4T p.374.1, 378-380, DA p.299.4, 300.1, 4T p.86, 9T p.274
SAVE THE DATE!
MORE INFO COMING SOON!
Q&A
Question: I have two gay siblings who have decided they can no longer be around my sister and me because, as Christians, we believe homosexuality to be a sin. We’ve loved our siblings for years and have never condemned them and have always embraced them and their partners. Now they will have nothing to do with us. Should we simply stay silent and respect their wishes?
Reply: I’m sorry this is happening to you and your family. But let’s take a look at what is really happening here.
In the beginning, when Adam and Eve sinned against God, what did they end up doing? They hid from Him. They were afraid to be around Him. They were riddled with guilt. Sin cannot stand in the presence of a holy God, for He is a consuming fire wherever impurity (sin) exists. God loved Adam and Eve no less after their sin than before their sin. He, knowing what had happened, walked in the garden to be with them. Of course, He had to shield them from His presence in order to protect them now that they were “unclean.” God was grieved at the loss of His intimate relationship with His children. But we see in this story the sober fact that sin separates. “But your iniquities have separated between you and your God, and your sins have hid his face from you, that he will not hear” (Isaiah 59:2).
Like God, you and your sister are now grieved because the sin of homosexuality has come between the two of you and your two gay siblings. Most likely you have done nothing to offend them. They just no longer feel comfortable around “holiness.” I say “holiness,” not to judge you as being perfect, but to make the point that as you are growing in grace day by day as Christians, becoming more and more like Jesus (and I hope this is so for by beholding Him daily we become changed into His likeness), the guilt of your siblings makes it very difficult for them to be around you.
You say that you have never condemned them and have always embraced them and their partners, so the fault is not in yourselves. What you are experiencing is what Jesus is experiencing every moment of every day. People He loves so dearly that He was willing to give His life so they might not receive the wages of their sins (John 3:16), are throwing all that love and sacrifice back into His face, not wanting it, nor caring about it. Oh! How He must continue to suffer because of the sins of His children!
Your question is, “Should we simply stay silent and respect their wishes?”
I’m sorry, but you can only get as close to them as they will let you. Yes, it is the right thing for you to do. Respect their wishes. However, never stop taking every opportunity that they do allow to show them unconditional love and acceptance. And never stop interceding for them in your prayers. Talk to the Lord about their lifestyle of sin, not to them. Commit them daily to His keeping. After all, He loves them more than you do, right?
Try to never miss an opportunity to send them greeting cards: birthdays, holidays, thinking of you notes, and thank you cards, etc. Like with anyone and everyone else you keep in touch with, don’t mention their sins. Mention your love and fond thoughts and interest in their activities and work that are not related to their life of sin. There’s much to mention in these types of greeting cards.
Another thing I believe to be very important is to make sure that they always see Jesus in you, in your life, in your behavior, in your words. “Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 2:5). Be consistent in your own lifestyle, so that they have no room to see hypocrisy in you. You may be the only Bible they ever read. So make sure that what they do read in you and see in you is the character of Jesus Christ.
Please don’t be too hard on yourselves. You must stop and realize that even Jesus, even God the Father, cannot save someone against his/her will. Look what happened to Lucifer in heaven. However, you can pray that the Lord will do whatever it takes to get their attention—whatever it takes to make them face eternal realities. He cannot force the will, the power of choice, but He can get their attention and bring circumstances around so they have to face eternal realities. This you can pray for, and then rest your minds at ease.
God be with you, dear ones. Be of good courage! Jesus will step in where you reach your limitations.
Victor
Q&A text taken from:
Author: “Victor J. Adamson”
(Ron Woolsey)
TESTIMONY
I had a misconstrued concept of God for many many years. Judgmental, controlling, domineering, strict, selfish & irrational were all the things I use to believe were the true character of God. It was hard for me to believe that he was anything other than this unfair judge looking down on me, anticipating the day that he would finally punish me for all my “sins”. I lived 26 years of my life with this ideology of God, going against everything I was taught to be “Christ-like”. Intriguingly enough, I’m now on the opposite side of the field, playing on his team! During off seasons I’m a passionate fan, enjoying every minute of our quality time together! So how did I go from avoiding him to enjoying his presence? Ignoring him to talking to him daily? Hating him to loving him? Judging him to understanding him? Here’s my story.
I was born in Limon, Costa Rica. I was the first born of two high school teenagers who had too much fun together. My mom was a Seventh Day Adventist who introduced my dad to God, who then later introduced my younger brother and I to him at a very young age. At the age of 4 my family and I moved to Boston Ma. Those early years of my life were a blur. We basically moved from home, to home until my parents were able to get on their feet and move us into our very own apartment. Sleeping on floors and not seeing either parent until bed time was the norm for my little brother and I. Our older cousins would feed us, get us ready and walk us to and from school during the weeks.
My parents worked double shifts until they were finally able to get us into an apartment of our own. It was exciting until my parents decided to separate. So, my mom, grandma, brother and I lived together while my dad would come visit on the weekends to take us to church. Church for the most part was boring to me. We would go sing, read, listen, stand up, sit down, pray and repeat for extended amounts of hours and it was rough. Well, at least in my little brain.
That was pretty much how my life went until something peculiar happened that stuck with me for the rest of my life. I’m in 4th grade of elementary school, around the age of 8 or 9. Mrs. D would occasionally bring her 17-year-old son and daughter to class with her. All the girls in class were instantly attracted to her son, while I on the other hand was mesmerized by her daughter. I couldn’t resist the urge to admire her beauty. But at the time, at such a young age, I didn’t know what any of that was or meant. I just instantly new that I was different.
Fast forward, I’m now 11 years old. My parents took the time to resolve their differences, packed us up and moved us to Gwinnet GA, to start our lives over, once again. As I grew into my pre-teen / adolescent years, my same sex attractions became stronger and stronger and my parents became stricter and stricter with religion. I’m pretty sure they connected the dots and made sense of what was happening before I could fully understand because the rules in the household became sterner with every move I took. We attended church not only on Saturdays, but also on Wednesdays and Friday evenings if service was scheduled. Every morning and evening we would have our family worship. We weren’t allowed to listen to secular music. We had to dress modestly, we were vegan as per my parents’ decision, sleepovers and going to the movies were out of the question and we were only allowed to hang around certain kids that were pre-approved by my parents. Can I tell you a secret? My parents were so scared about my soul being tainted by other peoples “bad influence” around me that my mom kept repeating to me on a daily 128,758,494,857,845 times a day “ By beholding we become changed, by beholding we become changed, by beholding we become changed.” I’d secretly roll my eyes and mumble it every time she would have me repeat it. But honestly, I’d think to myself that I was the bad influence.
I had a best friend that I love dearly to this day. We spent the majority of our time together but my parents made the decision to withdraw me from the church choir because she was also a member of the choir. I wasn’t allowed to see or speak to her under any circumstances. Shortly after, my social life was abruptly put to death when they decided to homeschool my brother and I. “Being homeschooled as an 8th grader was the worst thing that could ever happen to me”, were my exact thoughts. Every morning I'd look out the window and watch the neighborhood kids ride away to school on the yellow school bus that I so greatly desired to be on with them. Life during that year just felt like a jail to me. Some would say I’m being dramatic but this is actually how I felt. However, little did they know that their attempts to keep me sheltered and far from my best friend were to no avail because I found a perfect way to “escape” came nightfall. Every night, id wait till midnight, the hour that my parents were in stage 5 of their sleep cycle. I’d use those late-night hours to either call my best friend or chat online with a woman that I'd started a long-distance relationship with. I was a 12-year-old girl at the time, but pretended to be a 26-year-old man.
I spent the majority of my teenage and young adult years hiding in my room, virtually involved with these women all over the world before I was outed and decided to live my truth and leave the church. I left the church because I thought I knew how God felt about homosexuals. My dad made it clear that he was no longer proud of me because of the lifestyle I lived. He made sure to let me know that he was embarrassed by who I was so I decided to quit on God. Since he was such a religious person, I thought God felt the same way my dad felt about me. So, I said toodaloo to my conservative upbringing and moved on to greater things, or so I thought.
I moved in with my best guy friend at the time, who was also gay. We were out here living our best lives. It was constant partying nonstop from Thursday to Saturday night, every single weekend. I wont lie I had lots of fun. I spent the following years in many different relationships. I was, as some would say a serial monogamist. I’d start a relationship, be committed to it for a year or two and then decided I was ready to move on to the next without giving myself the space I needed after each relationship. Woman to woman, party to party, alcohol and weed was my life. I had fun, I wont lie, but it wasn’t’ fulfilling. The following day id wake up feeling worse and then some. Parties, women and drugs were fun for a limited time only.
At the age of 22 my entrepreneurial spirit kicked in and I decided to start my very own business and move in with my partner at the time. I decided that parties weren’t my thing anymore, I chose one woman, and decided to focus on my future and building financial freedom. The relationship with this particular person was great until it wasn’t. After 4 years of being together we decided to end it and stick to just business partners. You may be wondering why we broke up. We’ll unsurprisingly enough, I fell back into my old ways and decided that I wanted to see other people again. In spite of the relationship being a great one, I found a way to self-sabotage. No matter how great life was, it was hard for me to be happy. I had this unwavering feeling that there was something missing. There’s something or someone out there that I haven’t found, must find, need to find. Ironically enough that’s what I felt before I had my first lesbian kiss. After the kiss I thought I had found my place, I was where I belonged. I had finally found my people, my community. But as time went by, the void inside my chest kept getting bigger and bigger, and that’s when I realized, I hadn’t found what I thought I was looking for. However, “Let’s try something else, maybe if I’m open about the way I express my gender fluidity ill feel more comfortable. Maybe that’s what it is”.
For many years I’d always felt like it would be so much easier had I been born a man. I’d always been a tomboy, id always take the masculine roll in my relationships and honestly, I was determined to treat these women better than the average man. I was determined to take on this “perfect, lover boy, man of your dreams type persona”. I didn’t stop until I accomplished it. I undertook this mission by shopping in the men’s department, I cut my hair very short, I even took modeling classes and was taught how to walk the runway as a guy with the guys. It was an easy, enjoyable, satisfying feeling. Oddly enough I was greatly offended when someone would confuse my gender or get my pronouns wrong. I was a serial monogamist constantly seeking who to be in relationship with if I were ever to be single. Again I’d have moments of happiness, moments of pleasure, moments of fun and excitement but they only lasted as long as the party or vacation was underway. I had the freedom to do what and when I wanted. Nobody was shoving Jesus down my throat anymore but yet I was still unhappy and I could hide it anymore. I would start crying randomly throughout the day. I couldn’t quite put a finger on the reason for my sadness. I honestly didn’t know what was going on with me. I just knew that my overall goal in life is to be happy and I wasn’t. I ringed my aunt, who id shut off for the past 6 years of my life because of her persistent invitations to go to church or watch testimonies of ex-gays. I was annoyed by it all and decided not to speak to her anymore, but that all changed the day I was overwhelmed in my sadness and intuitively ranged her. After a 3-hour long call, she suggested I find professional help, and so I did.
I decided to go to therapy, where God met me. He met me where I was, and showed me who he really is. I just love the way he went about it. I went to therapy looking for happiness, and God showed me where I could find it. He literally showed me. How? Through a vision. Yes, a vision. I know it may sound bizarre, I thought it was too. He showed me that his purpose for my life is for me to be happy. Not the way I thought I could be happy. The way he knew Id be happy. There was no way for anybody to know this about me. Unless you were God. So, for the rest of 2020 and 2021 I was genuinely interested in learning who this God was. My childhood friends popped up out of the blue on different occasions and both sent me the same link to a sermon series that I later started watching, which ignited my interest to actually read the bible. As time went by, I began to see and understand the vision more clearly. At first, I was distraught. I’m not going to lie to you. In my vision he presented this new version of me. A feminine woman. Something I didn’t know how to do. I made it clear to him that I didn’t know how to do what he was asking me to do and how I was not on board. So, what did I do? I asked him to help me. “Lord”, I prayed “If you want me to be the woman you created me to be, I’m going to need your help. I need you to do this for me because I cant do it. You do it”. Guess what he did. He did it for me. I had to actively participate in order for there to be significant change in my life but my effort was plenty for him to work with.
In February of 2022 I decided that I was ready to go back to church. Honestly it was something that I was dreading because Christians tend to be very homophobic. However, I put all those thoughts aside and asked for help once again. “God, lead me to the right church. A church that won’t judge me based on what I look like. A church that will welcome me with open arms. A church that will teach me everything I forgot and continually help me to study your word”, I prayed. He did that too. It was the third church I visited during my “Find a church Tour”. The day I stepped in I knew it was the one. Everything I had asked God for in a church, was vibrantly present during that first visit, and he added a bonus. As I was leaving, a church elder came to greet me. When we exchanged names he asked, “Are you by any chance related to the food industry?”. “Yes, I own a vegan pastry shop”, I replied. He took a moment to stare. Yes stare, as if he were in utter shock as to who I was. After a few seconds of silence he says, “We have been praying for you”. I laughed. “What do you mean? You don’t even know me”, I chuckled. “Two years ago we received a prayer petition from one of your food suppliers. His petition was for God to restore your faith in him, and that he’ll bring you back to church one day. So, every Thursday and Sunday at 5am for the past 2 years the elders of this church have gathered to pray for you.” I was stunned. Overwhelmed and lost for words. A flood of tears immediately rushed to my eyes, and I broke down in 2,5 seconds. I literally had no words. To think that God was working on me before I knew he was. To think that I had strangers praying for me for the past 2 years. Everything was just beyond me. From that moment forward I decided that I wanted God in my life, for the rest of my life. He showed me that he would never leave me nor forsake me Deuteronomy 31:6. He showed me that he has loved me with everlasting love, therefore with lovingness he has drawn me. Jeremiah 31:3. He has shown me that nothing can separate me from the love of God Romans 8:31-39, that he wants me to be happy Jeremiah 29:11, and that he has a specific plan and purpose for my life Romans 8:28. God spoke to me on a personal level, defying all odds and erasing every preconceived thought I had about him. With his help I have chosen to live according to his will for my life, because I want what he wants for me. Peace, love, and happiness. Galatians 5:22-23, because with God all things are possible. Matthew 19:26.
Yaneesha Wanchope
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