COM Newsletter - October 2019
Hello from Michael Carducci, Chairman and co-founder of 'Coming Out' Ministries. I am excited to begin the roll out of our monthly newsletter. At 'Coming Out' Ministries, we want to inspire you with testimonies, enlighten you with answers to questions you or your loved ones may be seeking, and equip you with resources to help.
We will be addressing many issues related to sexuality from pornography, to adultery, sex addiction and LGBT+. Our hope is that this newsletter will help you take the stigma out of the “identity" battle that is both in and around the church and in your community. We also hope that it will help guide you to lovingly reach out to those who need to see Jesus today.
I was reading in Genesis 3:15, where Jesus announced that He would put enmity between her (mankind's) seed and his (Satan's) seed. It was brought to my attention that in this world, as time is running out and the enemy is gaining the whole world’s affection (see Revelation 13:3), where is the enmity?
I saw someone’s post on social media acquiescing to the enemy and stating that she was “getting comfortable with the pain of my existence”. It hit me that I needed to pray for more enmity between her and Satan. She had begun to identify with the lies of the enemy, driving her away from the love and peace of Jesus Christ. I realized that she may first need to be unsettled and unhappy, perhaps even miserable, in order to seek the Lord for satisfaction and joy.
A mother once said that she prayed this prayer for her daughter who was bi-sexual. “Lord, don’t give her what she seeks. Show her her need of You and interrupt her plans.” I couldn’t agree more. The issue wasn’t that she needed to be straight. The real issue is that she needed a Savior and a relationship with Jesus Christ. Straight people will not be in Heaven because they are heterosexual, only those that are redeemed and who know the Father and Son will be there, John 17:3.
Q&A
Question: How is homosexuality a learned behavior? I grew up in a heterosexual family where gays don’t just come out of the closet⎯they get hung! It took me 18 or 19 years to come out of the closet. I believe I was born this way. I just would like to know more. So how is this a learned behavior?
Reply: For years I believed that I was born gay; for as far back as I could remember I was attracted to the male gender sexually. But I now realize that for young children to have sexual attractions of any kind, like before puberty, is not natural, not normal. The hormones are not yet raging. At the age of four I was not equipped to deal with sexuality. That's why I found myself totally unequipped to deal with the loss of my innocence at the hands of a farmhand at that young age. I was not equipped to process what had happened. I just knew that it wasn't right. But, from that day onward found myself unable to control my fantasies and attractions. And I found myself to be an easy, repeat victim.
I believe, however, that there may be many, many different factors that play into someone's conditioning to be gay. You see, I personally believe that homosexuality is a conditioned or learned behavior. But I must quickly add that one's perception is his own reality. So I don't like to press hard on that point. If one believes he was born gay, so be it.
The bottom line is, what is to be done about it? If one is drowning in the sea, does it really matter how he found himself to be in that predicament? Does the lifeguard qualify the situation before offering the hand of deliverance? The same goes for one drowning in the sea of sin. Jesus doesn't seem to focus much upon the reasons one is the sinner he is, but rather simply offers him salvation from his sin. In Jeremiah 3, God says, "Only acknowledge thine iniquity... and I will heal your backslidings" (verses 13 and 22).
In my situation, after years of blaming others, especially God Himself, for my homosexuality, I finally came to acknowledge thatI was dealing with a sin issue. The Bible makes it clear that homosexuality is abominable behavior, a sin issue along with many other abominations, I might add. And as I decided to deal with my homosexuality in that light, using the Bible formulas for overcoming sin, I was able to walk away from my addictive homosexual behavior and lifestyle. Not without temptation, though.
Please don't misunderstand me here. I continued to struggle with temptation for some time. But then, Jesus was tempted in all points like we are; yet, He didn't sin (see Hebrews 4:15). So temptation, big deal! And Jesus "suffered being tempted" (Hebrews 2:18). That means that He had a tremendous struggle with temptation, urges desires, and passions, too. But He "resisted unto blood, striving against sin" (Hebrews 12:4). Jesus chose temptations die rather than yield to them. He expects no less from us, for He assures us that His grace, His divine transforming power and strength, is sufficient for us. He works in us "both to will and to do of His good pleasure." And we can be confident that He who has "begun a good work in [us] will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ" (Philippians 2:13; 1:6).
Bottom line? Born gay, or conditioned to be gay, no matter, God has a remedy. The question is, will you reach out your hand to His and allow Him to pull you from the sea of homosexuality to safety in His arms? He is not only your Life Giver, but your Life Saver and Life Sustainer as well.
Q&A text taken from:
TESTIMONY
I want to share an amazing divine appointment that happened this week. I was on location in Florida, finished a recording at 3pm, and decided to check out the “Impossible Burger" at Burger King. I was checking my texts while enjoying my meal and a young man poked his head around the corner and said “Hello". Within a split second, I knew he wasn’t someone I had recognized from the area and his name instantly came out of my mouth! He was as shocked to see me as I was him and shared that he had been reluctant to come and say hello. Having not seen him since a youth convention in 2018 in Houston, I was eager to catch up with him and invited him to join me. What were the chances that we would be having lunch at 3:30pm in a random Burger King on a Tuesday in West Florida? It was a God ordained appointment. We shared and caught up with each other, then we got to the very difficult topic of his SSA (same sex attraction).
He had an app on his phone where he could meet up with other men for encounters. He was remorseful, but also addicted. Not being able to share with anyone else, he opened up to me. I asked him if he would like me to help him delete the app on his phone so that he wouldn’t be as likely to act out. He said he would and as we went through the process, I made sure that I let him know that I didn’t judge or condemn him. I shared with him that Jesus had led us both to that Burger King to encourage and to help him. I told him how much Jesus loved him and also gave him tips on overcoming sex addiction and temptation and prayed with him right there in the middle of the restaurant! I also told him that when he was tempted to put the app back on his phone, to remember what had happened that day. I reminded him that just as Jesus had helped him to remove the app, He would give him strength to keep him and to shower His love on him so he would not need to act on his temptations, but rather pursue the love of God that satisfies and sustains.
Later that afternoon, it hit me how amazing God is! Many times, we pray and ask God for the words to share to our loved ones, whether it is our sons or daughters, to make them repent and come away from their destructive choices But God’s plan isn’t to use us in every situation. What if God will use someone that you don’t even know to speak to your loved one in a way that would reach into their heart to plant, water or harvest a life dedicated to Christ? One thing He does always use and that’s our prayers! They are vital and move the “arm of Omnipotence”!
The Bible gives us the example and formula for how to help someone be delivered. Mark 9:29; Luke 2:37; 1 Corinthians 7:5; Psalms 35:13; and Daniel 9:3, all talk about the power that is in prayer and fasting. Using God’s method, and in faith knowing that God promises to complete the work that He has started, you can have confidence to know that the Father is working and that He is even more desperate than you to reach your loved one. His eyes are watching them when you cannot be and He ministers to them even when you have not been called to.
Check out our resources at ComingOutMinistries.org and use our prayer request button to leave us your prayer request.
And please join us on our Prayer Line every Monday, Thursday and Friday for help and encouragement. (Details on the website).
UPDATE
Please consider making a donation to our ministry to help spread the message of God’s love and redemption! Kindly visit our website www.comingoutministries.org and select the Donate button, or you may send a check or money order directly to:
‘Coming Out’ Ministries at PO Box 227, Mount Vernon, OH 43050.
May God bless you for your support!